A bit under the weather I think.

Or maybe it’s just the day, the grey or my big fat head. Whatever it is, I’m in a snit.

Not a snit where you yell and kick and blame others for what they know you did, but a snitty kind of snit. An out of focus snit. An out of breath snit. A newspaper reading, the worlds all the same, except for witches snit.

They were buried and burned by the way. The witches I mean. Maybe not in that order, those witches by neighbors who feared for their daughters. Those neighbors cared not one bit for the witches, but gathered in groups and posses and mobs. Mobs in a snit. Mobs in a fear fit. Mobs who dug holes to put their snit in it. Their snits, the witches and tires on top. Relieved they went back, those mobs, to their crops. Until next time. . .

I clicked “close”.

Knowing the news, being “in the know” is no friend when you’re feeling low. Unless your goal is to feel lower than low, in which case it does just fine.

ya know?

* Image: Award winning advertisement for Risperdal.

Today’s picture was taken by Inna Hoichman. Misha of course could not possibly stay off the water in this recent storm at Hilton Beach in Tel Aviv. Seems every time I see a picture of Misha it’s in conditions only the downright crazy would paddle in. Well. . . had I been there I would have joined him. . .

Meanwhile off the coast of Tasmania Andrew McAuley is crossing over the 1/3rd mark of his journey to New Zealand. So far so good. It can make my teeth hurt if I think about it too much. Just amazing. Andrew is one of a kind. Of course you have to give a lot of credit to his wife who is keeping us all posted each day. I imagine she’s got to be a bit stressed as well.

Over on the Chasing The Ana blog I’ve posted an introduction to Carrie Medina of Luna y Sol Kayak in Puerto Rico. We’re glad to have met her.

You may too want to check out my Puerto Rico paddling partner’s blog as well. Wendy Killoran, I hear draws electricity wherever she goes. Striking. . . Check it out.

Freya Hoffmeister has posted the Specs of the new Rockpool Underground on her blog. Some of you were asking me about that. Note too that if you’re here in the Midwest you could possibly get one by March. No promises, but contact Freya about that.

Don’t forget that the Sweetwater Sea Kayak Symposium is coming up in just a couple weeks in Florida. This will be a great opportunity to meet Hadas Feldman of Israel who will be circumnavigating Newfoundland next summer. I wonder if she’ll be singing? In addition to Hadas other well know coaches this year will be Gordon Brown, Steve Maynard, Dale Williams, Shawna Franklin, Leon Somme, Jeff Allen, Mel Rice, Mark Schoon and many others. And let us not forget Lamar Hudgens who was willing to put his signature on my 4* cert. Crazy man. . .

At first I thought my new little tent was a lonely place to be. Any time I pack up the little MSR I know I’m going to be on my own. The say it sleeps 2, but I’m sure they mean 2 Brazilian super models. (Or at least two people in a position that’s good for some things, but not necessary sleeping.) In fact I bought the MSR looking for something small I could pack in around my skegbox and set up easily and quickly after my kayak slipped up onto a sandy beach. It’s usually about the time you’re setting up your tent that you find you don’t have the energy to stand properly.

The first couple times in the tent it felt like sleeping in a budget motel outside of a truck diner. I’d lay there most of the night tossing and turning and getting very little sleep. I’m sure it’s got something to do with some past flash backs. Years ago when I used to work for a marketing company out of Sarasota FL. I would drive up and down the east coast doing advance work for stage shows. It meant many nights spent alone in strange hotels. I’d never sleep. So then I started making habits of finding some local bar and the end of the day and take in a bit of liquid sedative with the hopes that it would distract me from that bit of yellow light that always seems to find it’s way through motel curtain windows. It hardly ever worked. I’d just lay there all night feeling exhausted and buzzed up. Or my experiences of the evening would leaving me musing away on some very strange subjects.

One night I was just outside of New York in some bar with a great band blasting away on stage. A guy came up and sat down at my table and opened up a conversation. We talked about New York, the east coast, life in Wisconsin or whatever came up. We were quite a few drinks into the night and I was enjoying the company. Then out of the blue, he just looked at me point blank and said, ” I don’t want to offend you. . . but I’d love to give you a bl*w j*b.” Tell me you’d expect that statement to just come across a table at you!?? After I got through that momentary shock I stuttered, “Well, thanks for the offer but I’m straight.” He was obviously now as uncomfortable as I was. I said, “No, I’m not offended. . just not into it”. I sort of smiled and looked down at the table. We laughed a bit and soon were again talking about life. In the end it was a good evening. Good conversation. But for a kid from Wisconsin, the nights conversation left me quite unable to sleep.

There was another night somewhere in upstate NY, when after many nights without sleep I was working in my office around 11pm and I put my head down on the desk and drifted off. I hadn’t slept long when there was a noise. I jolted up to find the barrel of a revolver about 6 inches from my nose. Time froze as you’d guess. Slowly I was able to widen my vision to see it was being held by a police officer who apparently thought I was an intruder. A sleeping intruder?? Well, after looking at my ID he left. Always wondered what they hell that one was about.

I also spent a couple of December nights dead broke and sleeping in a car but that’s a whole other story. . .

Slowly I’ve grown used to sleeping alone in my little tent. I’ve found a place for my stuff and these days it’s like bringing your home with you wherever you go. Usually I have clothing all over the place and it makes for a nice little cocoon. I think what changed my feeling was spending a night in my tent with 104 fever. From then on it just felt more like a “safe” place. I look forward to traveling around this summer and living in my little home away from home. I find I enjoy having my own little sanctuary, a place to go when I don’t feel like being social. A little isolation is a good thing. Other times though, I still think I’d rather have company. . . preferably female. . .

Another Saturday morning has arrived. Out my window the snow has frozen into a nice white crusty mirror that is reflecting the pinks and purples of the sun rising in the deep south below Wisconsin’s mini-mountain range. I’m not sure why it is, but looking out across the barren fields that surround my house it always seems much more brutal that I’m sure it actually is. I’m quickly growing tired of winter. Sad too because we’ve hardly had a winter at that.

If you’ve not checked it out, you may like the video of Omer of Terra Santa Kayaks doing some graceful lazy surfing in Israel. There’s also this bikini thing going on, but who’d be interested in that sort of thing!?

Remember my post about the Gym? Well, just to gauge how wimpy I really am I decided to see how much weight I could actually leg-press. Drum roll please. . . I got up to 365lbs. I could get off about 10 then I was cooked. I tried it at 400 and I may as well have been pushing on the side of house. I’ll say it again, Wimp!

There are a few newer blogs out there worth visiting. Recently I’ve enjoyed checking out Alison Dyer’s blog.

Some of you were probobly at Canoecopia last year and watched as one of the owners of Rutabaga took some very public rolling lessons in the event pool. I couldn’t imagine how anyone could learn with an audience that size. He came very close. I’m sure he would’nt mind me sharing this. Jeff Weidman (pictured above) can now roll! He is the perfect example of how sticking with it and not giving up pays off.

Lastly today I want to correct a little oversight I made in my Monday Rockpool post. I forgot to add Mark Tozer to my list of Rockpool sponsored kayakers. A big oversight too since Mark is the first on the list. Where was my head!?? If you don’t know, Mark is the guy who founded and organized the UK Storm Gathering Sea Symposium. Mark is a Sea Kayak Coach and Mountain Instructor located in North Wales. You can visit his website “Edge of Adventure” Here. Mark wrote a nice piece yesterday about Rockpool co-owner Aled Williams. Certainly it reiterates why a Rockpool sponsorship is such an honor, and why owning one of their kayaks is something special.

Well, I’m going to try to get through my bit of cabin fever today and head out to the pool. Still working on that offside hand roll. Jeff’s my inspiration. Stick with it and it will come. . .

Hmmm, did I forget a lyric? Well, here’s what was going through by mind this morning;

Now here’s a news flash. . . . First time on the water! Wow! This is Rockpool’s new “underground” Greenland style roller. Remember you’ll get your first chance to see one up close in the states at Canoecopia in just a couple months. Hey, is that a wing??

So ask me if I’m excited. . .

You all know my fixation with Reed gear. Yeah, they make it possible for the secret order of Kayak Ninja to wrap ourselves in back gear. Not that you can’t go with yellow or blue too, but black is my thing. The deal with Reed’s gear is that it’s just so warm and comfortable. I’ve had my cags for some time now and am always amazed how they just totally kill the effects of wind when I’m out on the water. Something that really effects me quickly. Even in my drysuit I can feel the breeze sneaking through. Not in my Reeds though. Just great stuff. So it just feels really cool and somehow apt to be able to say I’m sponsored by Reed. Thanks so much to Chris & Jo. They’ve been really kind to me over the last year as it is while I’ve been bugging them about customizations, out of date logos and every other fiddly bit I’ve come to them with. I’d thought it was just as likely they told me “derrick, please don’t shop at our store any longer. . “

Now here’s something I didn’t know. You can order Chillcheater products online here in the States from Second Wind Sports who is the North American distributor. Of course here in the Midwest you can also get Reed stuff from the Geneva Kayak Center near Chicago. But you do have to drive there.

Now we can’t all look as good as Freya Hoffmeister in her Reeds, but we can still look pretty damn cool.

I’ve said this before, but it seems somehow worth repeating. We are not islands. No matter how much we’d like to think we are. We owe so many people for giving us the gifts of knowledge and encouragement along the way. Sometimes people take themselves too seriously. They believe their own hype. I can see how that can happen, how the trap can be laid. In my experience I always got that sort of “you’ll never amount to anything” kind of encouragement. As a teenager I was, like many others, into my music, my art, writing and all that other stuff that does not fit in the, “grow up, work hard, and die” ethos of the Midwest. Yet, these days I’m a bit thankful. It gave me reason to strive. Certainly when you grow up feeling like others have been less than helpful you begin to see yourself as an island. You find yourself becoming your own cheering section. You can start patting your own shoulder. Buying your own birthday cake as it were. Suddenly without realizing it you can become an egomaniac. Thing is, that’s never exactly how it went down. All that time you spent feeling like you had to prove your own worth, and fight for your bit of bread can cloud your memory. Everyone that did help, you can conclude, had some self serving motivation. So they don’t count. Suddenly there you are a statue to you’re own greatness. You become a walking, talking, god of your own self-accomplishment. You are a god of your own island. A very puny island indeed!

In the world of sea kayaking things have went well for me recently. Amazing really. And certainly I don’t want to discard the work I’ve done, or the hours and hours of “butt in boat” time I’ve put in. Certainly I tossed a lot of cash at symposiums, classes, boats, gear and really set my mind to a goal. But on the other hand, Nothing I can do has not been done before. 10,000 kayakers are better skilled than I will ever hope to be. Every door I pass through has been opened by someone. Every skill I’ve learned has been taught to me by others. We are products of our mentors. If things are going well, I know I owe it to others. They clothed me, fed me, encouraged and nurtured me along the way. Even as we plan our upcoming trip I know we are blessed with the kindness and generosity of others. Often with little regard for what they will get out of it. You can see their support any way you wish, but come on, are we really worth the investment they are putting in? To tell you the truth it’s a bit daunting to think about living up to their goodwill. An honor we have to work to deserve.

The other day one of my mentors pulled a tennis ball out of their hatch, smiled at me and said, “look, your idea!” Well, it was not my idea of course. It was Shawna & Leon’s idea. In fact most of my instructional method I stole from them or someone else. When it works, it’s to their credit not mine. I appreciated the compliment. But if I believed it, I would be a raging loony.