eye of terror
April 27th, 2007 | 
Author: 
It’s the terror of knowing
What the world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming ‘Let me out’
– bowie
I woke up this morning at realized. . . “OH MY GOD I’M GOING TO WALES!!!” Suddenly it was time to take an anxiety pill! Ok, so like I had said before I had not really thought much of it. I mean sure, I talked to Janna at Trak about my new folding kayak a bit. I’ve talked a little to Justine Curgenven and Axel Schoevers about what to do when I get there. Of course I want to find Simon again. I’ve missed him quite a bit. . (In a big MANLY SORT OF WAY OF COURSE. . ) And I’m looking foreword to seeing Rowland although truth be told he’s one of the last great BCU coaches that scares me. I know I’ll do everything backwards if he’s around LOL! Then I talked to Mike at Rockpool about my dream 3 peice. Not ready yet, but he said I can borrow a Rockpool for the symposium. Good thing I want to be snuggly and safe!! I can’t thank Mike enough for what he’s doing for me! But still, it seemed like “play”. Like something not really real.
Then for some reason this morning It hit me. 5 days! Oh my God!!! Now the thing is, you guys have followed along long enough to know I am NOT the worlds greatest kayaker. I live in Wisconsin for God’s sake. Sure it’s fun to watch all those big wipeouts on Justine’s videos but it’s a whole other deal to contemplate going out in Penrhyn Mawr? You’ve got to be freaking kidding me!??? (you notice that “Mawr” contains the world “MAW” don’t you!!) For some reason I keep thinking . . . I do NOT want to swim there! Hell, I don’t even want to roll. . but I fear it will happen. . . Often. Many of you have not seen the original Nigel Dennis promo video that was the precursor for “This Is The Sea”. In that one Justine goes out into the races for what must have been one of the first times. . You can hear it in her voice. . I think if Justine was nervous???? Yikes, I’ll be needing a new drysuit
Then the idea of 5* training . . First. We have NO tides in Wisconsin. Well not more than 6 inches anyway. So I understand concepts of using the tide to get from here to there, and how water flow and wind and such can effect conditions. But at the same time, without being in those conditions regularly it’s all guess work. Fantasy. What would you do if. . .? How the hell do I know! LOL!
Oh, and navigation!! Ok, so know how to read a chart. Fine. I have some idea how to find my way around, estimate speed and such. But again, all theory. This is why you take the training. Funny how you want to know all the answers before you actually take the class. Oh well, failure makes a good teacher if you’re willing to learn from it.
So what will happen the next two weeks? I don’t know. I’m excited, nervous, and a little scared to be honest. But of course I will tell you all about it. After 4 years of kayaking. . derrick is finally going to Mecca. 
Oh, did you see the kayak in the picture?
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Fear – like the kayak’s bow – is in the eye of the beholder. So keep in mind, the first step is the worse. The rest is when the fun begins!
Moi – scary??? Surely not!! (Frightful perhaps – but that’s a WHOLE different story!)
It’ll be fun!!
Fair winds and following seas….
Rowland
As the masthead on my blog says, “Good judgement comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement”. My goal the last time in England was to drink nothing but Real Ale, which I achieved easily. As a fellow Wisconsin boy, I would recommend the product highly.
The way you talk, fear makes every dry suit a wet suit. I’ve seen you paddle and rock and roll (and drink…but I digress). You gonna’ do us proud…..no pressure