wandering stars
Published March 13, 2009 | 
She said don’t I know you
From the cinematographer’s party,
I said who am I
To blow against the wind,
– paul simon
I read an article recently lamenting the passing of the true explorers. These days, the article suggested, the only thing left was to make the challenges bigger by adding risk. Now you can’t simply trek to the north pole for instance. You must do it on one leg, backwards with a mask over both eyes and dressed in nothing but in your underwear. I mean let’s face it, these days rich tourists with a passport and Columbia jacket can enjoy the experience of almost dying off the coast of Antarctica all from the discomfort of a sinking cruise ship. You really have to make some effort to beat that.
As kayakers we certainly have to be aware of that outside push to “go big”. Between the DVDs, magazines, sponsors, blogs, Google map destinations and computer projected presentations you’d get the feeling everyone in a kayak is pushing the boundaries. I think even we lowly paddler types get ourselves into a bit of a trap when we share so much of our adventures as we tend to these days. We are tempted to slowly ratchet up our trips because we know we’re being watched, or read, or spied on by the black helicopter people…
Some suggest this is all a big ego fest and to some extent it is, and that’s the point really. Because sometimes it’s not intentional. I think for most it’s simply an accident of techno-exposure and peer pressure. It’s like going out to eat at a nice restaurant. You may simply go out for your own enjoyment but still you wash up because it’s public. You know you’ll be seen. Even if everyone else in the restaurant is a stranger, you still have your self-respect driving you make a good impression, or at least not be a total pig.
With those sorts of musings swirling around my head, I’ve had a really tough time deciding where I wanted to paddle next. I mean, I’m not looking to be Freya. (Only Freya can be Freya!!) I’m also not interested in frost bite or 80 mile open water crossings. Yet at the same time I know that at some point I have to say. . “I’m going to go to. . .” and deal with the fall out of whatever expectations someone holds. That’s simply part of life… and life in the blogger bubble, even when we are not Uber paddlers. The trick is to step back from your own digi-hype and not get owned by misplaced vanity. You can’t get sucked into choosing a destination because of how it looks in print or how the destination slips off your tongue. At that point you’ve lost it. I admit there was moment or two where my judgment was coming from that dark closet.
A moment. .
Then I said to myself, WTF!??
About then is time for a little personal review. I do have a drive to see the world and love that edge between water and land. I also enjoy sharing my experiences and writing my various flash back induced perspectives. I love sharing photographs. Photography to me is not simply about saying “see where I went” but it’s also about framing a memory right there at that moment when I press the shutter button. Finding your inner photographer’s mind makes you take a second look at the world around you. Sharing the images later is simply a bonus. So wherever I go it has to be some place I want to explore, photograph, and write about. If I’m not inspired to creativity by the places I visit I may as well just go home. You don’t simply paddle to “win” or show off or whatever.
So in the end I put away all the magazine cover destinations I had rolling in my mind. I tossed them all away in favor of the one I saw in an episode of Scooby Doo. THAT felt really good! It felt like me. Now that I’m in the planning stages I can happy let it go by when someone displays that “Derrick is weird” look when I tell them about my plans. It’s ok. I’ll love it, and I’ll paddle with camera in hand and write when I can and share it with anyone who cares. In the end paddling is not about being ground breaking, it’s much more about staying grounded.
*self by Kazimierz Nowak.
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5 Responses to wandering stars
What about thye Isle of Man. You could be done and dusted in a day!
Derrick…
No you’ll never quite be Freya. No need to worry bout that! Not ever. Not meant to happen.
Do they have ‘Scooby Snacks’ at your new destination? Clues?
It depends upon our personal make-up on how we each enjoy repeated or similar experiences (some get bored real quick), but there’s a lack of respect, a lack of marketing value and hence a hush, a missing encouragement on going paddling close to home, over and over. It doesn’t sell stories, magazines and DVD’s quite so much. You talk about it.
I love returning noticing things like the leaves finally making the shoreline green, that I can no longer see over the reeds, or that the Lilly-pad flowers are almost at the surface – the ongoing changes and growth in Nature. Treasured things like seeing Loon chicks on Mama’s back, and a dozen chicks following mama duck, or seeing an otter, seal, whatever. Noting the water is high with Spring flood, then later, it’s dropped 4 feet and I need be careful to not scrape gelcoat onto those rocks. Appreciating also the peace and the quiet out there where birds and bugs are singing as we float around leaving no permanent trails at all. Sometimes it’s a real bonus to have only a brief walk or short drive to get to the water’s edge; That can mean going often, something very few of us can do on expeditions repeatedly!
Happy planning!
MarcP
Hey Mark!
I enjoy repeat paddles locally myself, especially in the spring and fall when the world is quite dynamic. I also love paddling in rain and summer storms. I’ll just dart out to my local lake to get on the water when there is going to be nice crazy summer weather.
On the other hand I also need to see something new at least every year or so just to hit the reset button. There is something very important about getting your mind and eyes in places they have never been.
Scooby Snacks? Ah no. . but Daphne’s Cousin. . .
Jeez, Derrick – that’s not much of a hint – Daphne has so MANY cousins – do you mean the one from Scotland? With the haunted castle?
oh man, you’re good!